Tuesday, August 03, 2010
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Two Weddings and No Funerals
My latest 2.5-week adventure to Australia in June was to celebrate the weddings of two great friends of mine: high school friend Dzung (pronounced ‘Yoong’) and HSC Study Camp friend Tim. Fortunately for me, I could combine the two events in one flight from Samoa (what an environmentally conscious move... :-)
I arrived in Sydney on Friday afternoon, met Dzung and his fiancée Ruth for a combined Bucks/Hens BBQ on Saturday at lunch, and celebrated their wedding the next day. We almost didn’t make it – had Ruth not separated Dzung and I chatting religion and philosophy for hours on Saturday night...
During the lunch, I was able to share a few of my impressions of Dzung: his fine intellect, his high standards, his irrepressible romantic tendencies, his strength, his near-metrosexuality, and his deep thinking. I likened Dzung’s question-posing abilities to one of the great question-askers: Jesus. A dialogue between the two of them could go something like this…
I arrived in Sydney on Friday afternoon, met Dzung and his fiancée Ruth for a combined Bucks/Hens BBQ on Saturday at lunch, and celebrated their wedding the next day. We almost didn’t make it – had Ruth not separated Dzung and I chatting religion and philosophy for hours on Saturday night...
1. Dzung & Ruth: a beautifully personalised masterpiece
Dzung and Ruth have been together for about 4.5 years, and are very well suited to each other. It was a pleasure to see them publicly declaring their individually prepared vows in a beautifully personalised ceremony. Set on a stunning outlook over the cliffs of Stanwell Tops, just south of Sydney, Dzung’s romantic masterpiece came together like the delicately interwoven strands of a great tapestry. Those floods of tears pouring over Dzung’s cheeks at Ruth’s graceful entrance were a sight to behold (for some amazing photos of the day, check out http://www.vlblog.net/wedding-at-tumbling-waters-retreat-stanwell-tops-crystal-palace/). For those pivotal moments etched into our memories for a lifetime, this was one moment to stake a memory flag (especially for Dzung: my big flag was almost 12 months ago but it’s still fresh)!
Dzung and Ruth have been together for about 4.5 years, and are very well suited to each other. It was a pleasure to see them publicly declaring their individually prepared vows in a beautifully personalised ceremony. Set on a stunning outlook over the cliffs of Stanwell Tops, just south of Sydney, Dzung’s romantic masterpiece came together like the delicately interwoven strands of a great tapestry. Those floods of tears pouring over Dzung’s cheeks at Ruth’s graceful entrance were a sight to behold (for some amazing photos of the day, check out http://www.vlblog.net/wedding-at-tumbling-waters-retreat-stanwell-tops-crystal-palace/). For those pivotal moments etched into our memories for a lifetime, this was one moment to stake a memory flag (especially for Dzung: my big flag was almost 12 months ago but it’s still fresh)!
Dzung: Good teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?
Jesus: Why do you call me good? No one is good but God alone.
D: Upon what basis do you claim that God alone is good?
J: Do you doubt the Biblical record?
Jesus: Why do you call me good? No one is good but God alone.
D: Upon what basis do you claim that God alone is good?
J: Do you doubt the Biblical record?
D: Why are you so confident in an unscientific source?
J: …Why are you wearing a pink t-shirt?
The Vietnamese banquet later that night was certainly an entertaining cultural experience. The food was the main highlight (there’s no Vietnamese food in Samoa), though our MC/singer/entertainer had to be a close second. I’m not sure what was funnier… his attempts to work the crowd over the top of techno music, his spontaneous bursting into song, or his fluoro happy pants with chain-link sides. There were also a number of other memorable features… An hour’s worth of photos of the ‘happy’ couple with all the wedding guests in front of their personalized wall of rotating chandelier-disco-light. Their own karaoke-style video on loop as we entered… any Celine Dion song could have fitted seamlessly over the top. Dzung and Ruth were very good-hearted about it all and we really enjoyed ourselves.
2. Tim & Heidi-Jane: a musically-infused celebration
J: …Why are you wearing a pink t-shirt?
The Vietnamese banquet later that night was certainly an entertaining cultural experience. The food was the main highlight (there’s no Vietnamese food in Samoa), though our MC/singer/entertainer had to be a close second. I’m not sure what was funnier… his attempts to work the crowd over the top of techno music, his spontaneous bursting into song, or his fluoro happy pants with chain-link sides. There were also a number of other memorable features… An hour’s worth of photos of the ‘happy’ couple with all the wedding guests in front of their personalized wall of rotating chandelier-disco-light. Their own karaoke-style video on loop as we entered… any Celine Dion song could have fitted seamlessly over the top. Dzung and Ruth were very good-hearted about it all and we really enjoyed ourselves.2. Tim & Heidi-Jane: a musically-infused celebration
Tim has the wonderful inclination to invest heavily in his close friends, and the lead-up to his wedding certainly demonstrated this.
I was fortunate enough to share a spa and beers with him while watching NSW be destroyed by Queensland in the second State of Origin. Along with his mates, we spent a full day playing sport, eating and socializing for his Bucks Party, and watched Australia painfully draw with Ghana in the Soccer World Cup. We shared a meal with the rest of the bridal party after the wedding rehearsal – no sporting events involved. And the boys in the bridal party spent the night before the wedding drinking a fine selection of beers, playing pool, relaxing in the spa, toasting marshmallows, watching sport, and smoking cigars by the fire. Hmmmm… it’s amazing that we managed to wake up the next morning at all. Yet Tim awoke excitedly and before I was even out of bed, he was dressed… in my shirt.
The wedding itself was a musically-infused celebration, with both Tim and Heidi-Jane demonstrating their ample talent in song-writing, recording and conducting. It also contained the marks of Tim’s cheeky humour, by projecting the groomsmen’s hypothetical thoughts onto the screen in the final seconds before the processional…
I had the privilege of preaching at the church service from 1 John 4, looking at love: God-style. When there are so many conflicting messages about love in the public arena, I focused on the type of love God demonstrated through Jesus. I think Tim and HJ both possess the type of love that mirrors God’s love, and this should enable them to cultivate a strong relationship for a lifetime. With the amount of enthusiastic support demonstrated by their friends and family, they have the ingredients for a great marriage. They certainly got off to a great start.
I was fortunate enough to share a spa and beers with him while watching NSW be destroyed by Queensland in the second State of Origin. Along with his mates, we spent a full day playing sport, eating and socializing for his Bucks Party, and watched Australia painfully draw with Ghana in the Soccer World Cup. We shared a meal with the rest of the bridal party after the wedding rehearsal – no sporting events involved. And the boys in the bridal party spent the night before the wedding drinking a fine selection of beers, playing pool, relaxing in the spa, toasting marshmallows, watching sport, and smoking cigars by the fire. Hmmmm… it’s amazing that we managed to wake up the next morning at all. Yet Tim awoke excitedly and before I was even out of bed, he was dressed… in my shirt.
The wedding itself was a musically-infused celebration, with both Tim and Heidi-Jane demonstrating their ample talent in song-writing, recording and conducting. It also contained the marks of Tim’s cheeky humour, by projecting the groomsmen’s hypothetical thoughts onto the screen in the final seconds before the processional…
I had the privilege of preaching at the church service from 1 John 4, looking at love: God-style. When there are so many conflicting messages about love in the public arena, I focused on the type of love God demonstrated through Jesus. I think Tim and HJ both possess the type of love that mirrors God’s love, and this should enable them to cultivate a strong relationship for a lifetime. With the amount of enthusiastic support demonstrated by their friends and family, they have the ingredients for a great marriage. They certainly got off to a great start.
Saturday, May 08, 2010
Injury-Induced Bonding
Brother Will in Samoa for a week. An opportunity for great fun and adventure with a close friend, right? Well, let’s not get ahead of ourselves... Throw a torn ankle ligament into the mix. Crutches. Now these adventurous plans don’t look so promising.
Yep, my injury meant we couldn’t cycle around the island of Savaii or explore the more remote parts of Samoa. Instead, we consigned ourselves to reading, chatting and watching sport. Not quite the holiday us active young males were expected.
This (negative?) experience brought to light a question I had been concerned about for some time:
Is the quality of my close relationships contingent upon a shared interest (in Will’s case, physical activity)?
Testing Ground
This is an aspect of relationships I’ve noticed most between males (especially involving sport), and one I have been aware of in myself. Being a sporty person, I have invested heavily in others who also enjoy sports. Of course it’s natural that I’d have this shared interest as the basis of the friendship (at least initially), which I’d see as perfectly acceptable. However, for more significant relationships, I’d expect greater depth to grow to the extent that if the shared interest were removed, there would still be closeness and mutual value from that friendship. Will’s week in Samoa proved an interesting testing ground...
Glory, Girl, Money
He arrived in Samoa at 12:30am and was on the cricket field at 2:00pm for the second annual Samoan ANZAC Day Twenty20 Cricket Match between Australians and New Zealanders in Samoa. The noticeably more serious Aussie cricketers, led by our cricket-tragic High Commissioner, were first to bat. Will was opening batsman. I was consigned to the scorers role. I watched my brother dominate proceedings to the admiration of the High Commissioner (who freely made job offers mid-pitch). 19 runs with the bat and 2 vital wickets with the ball, he was almost in line for man-of-the-match, in a fairly one-sided affair... He took the glory that could have been mine!
Fortunately enough, despite my injury, we were able to do some exploring: a couple of waterfalls, a couple of walks, the volcanic Sua Ocean Trench and one of our favourite beaches. Though for half of these adventures, I was left while Will accompanied Heather to the more inaccessible parts... He took the girl that is mine (not really, but it reads better that way)!
Heather, Will and I took the opportunity to reflect and discuss a discussion booklet produced by World Vision New Zealand on ‘Living Simply’. It raised questions about our materialistic culture and its compatibility with Christianity. Even living in Samoa, we’ve not been immune to the drug to excessively consume, upgrade and indulge. It was interesting to note that wherever ‘Consumerism’ has flourished, religion/spirituality (of all types) has been squeezed out. We’ve been prompted to reflect on how our lifestyle and spending choices have wide impacts, to ourselves and others... By introducing this discussion, he took away my right to spend my own money with impunity!
My injury took away the physical element of my relationship with Will. As a result, he got the glory and the girl. He also stripped away any sense of pride towards materialistic success. This could easily have led to conflict had our relationship been based only on shared interest. However, conflict was only evident in our discussions on the ethical dimension of military intervention.
Firm Foundation
On the contrary, this experience only served to deepen my relationship with Will... We had ample time to share the big issues of life with each other... He could spend quality time with my two special ladies in our natural habitat... And this confirmed that our relationship was built not on our shared interest in physical activity, but on a much firmer foundation. I hope all my significant relationships are built on a similarly firm foundation, sore ankle or not.
Yep, my injury meant we couldn’t cycle around the island of Savaii or explore the more remote parts of Samoa. Instead, we consigned ourselves to reading, chatting and watching sport. Not quite the holiday us active young males were expected.
This (negative?) experience brought to light a question I had been concerned about for some time:
Is the quality of my close relationships contingent upon a shared interest (in Will’s case, physical activity)?
Testing Ground
This is an aspect of relationships I’ve noticed most between males (especially involving sport), and one I have been aware of in myself. Being a sporty person, I have invested heavily in others who also enjoy sports. Of course it’s natural that I’d have this shared interest as the basis of the friendship (at least initially), which I’d see as perfectly acceptable. However, for more significant relationships, I’d expect greater depth to grow to the extent that if the shared interest were removed, there would still be closeness and mutual value from that friendship. Will’s week in Samoa proved an interesting testing ground...
Glory, Girl, Money
He arrived in Samoa at 12:30am and was on the cricket field at 2:00pm for the second annual Samoan ANZAC Day Twenty20 Cricket Match between Australians and New Zealanders in Samoa. The noticeably more serious Aussie cricketers, led by our cricket-tragic High Commissioner, were first to bat. Will was opening batsman. I was consigned to the scorers role. I watched my brother dominate proceedings to the admiration of the High Commissioner (who freely made job offers mid-pitch). 19 runs with the bat and 2 vital wickets with the ball, he was almost in line for man-of-the-match, in a fairly one-sided affair... He took the glory that could have been mine!
Fortunately enough, despite my injury, we were able to do some exploring: a couple of waterfalls, a couple of walks, the volcanic Sua Ocean Trench and one of our favourite beaches. Though for half of these adventures, I was left while Will accompanied Heather to the more inaccessible parts... He took the girl that is mine (not really, but it reads better that way)!
Heather, Will and I took the opportunity to reflect and discuss a discussion booklet produced by World Vision New Zealand on ‘Living Simply’. It raised questions about our materialistic culture and its compatibility with Christianity. Even living in Samoa, we’ve not been immune to the drug to excessively consume, upgrade and indulge. It was interesting to note that wherever ‘Consumerism’ has flourished, religion/spirituality (of all types) has been squeezed out. We’ve been prompted to reflect on how our lifestyle and spending choices have wide impacts, to ourselves and others... By introducing this discussion, he took away my right to spend my own money with impunity!
My injury took away the physical element of my relationship with Will. As a result, he got the glory and the girl. He also stripped away any sense of pride towards materialistic success. This could easily have led to conflict had our relationship been based only on shared interest. However, conflict was only evident in our discussions on the ethical dimension of military intervention.
Firm Foundation
On the contrary, this experience only served to deepen my relationship with Will... We had ample time to share the big issues of life with each other... He could spend quality time with my two special ladies in our natural habitat... And this confirmed that our relationship was built not on our shared interest in physical activity, but on a much firmer foundation. I hope all my significant relationships are built on a similarly firm foundation, sore ankle or not.
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